Journey between Seas

My 34th birthday just passed. Man, I feel old. I grieve a lot but I'm learning to also be thankful for all that I have been given. Music speaks a lot to my soul. One of my most recent favorite songs is "Braver Still" it says and "it's okay to grieve the life that could not be. Last night I played the ungame with some friends. It was really nice, but I got sad when asked what the perfect life would have looked like. I said "travelling, being married with several children and homeschooling them. You see we all struggle with abandonment issues, it's human nature, no one does not fail us in some way or another. It's hard to understand a father that is always with him when all we have is earthly examples. Today I think it's okay to grieve the life that could not be but I can't dwell in it. I need to remember my father is so different from those of the world and that is the hope I long to share with others. He does everything for a reason and I am so blessed but yet sometimes I don't see it. I'm thankful for all the people he has and continues to put in my life and trusting that if I do my part He will provide.

NOEL

The day I found out I was accepted to teach overseas I panicked a little. How am I going to do this Father? I know you've provided in the past but I'm still scared. My devotional that day happened to be on how He sends us things that may have been different from our plans but we(meaning me!) must trust that He will provide.

That evening, I was at work at the thrift store and this sweet girl who had spent hours finding just the right things that went together to decorate was struggling. I was at the register and her card was declined. She called the bank and it said it shouldn't be. I tried to process it several ways with no success. I was embarrassed for her and wanted to help but had very little funds. I kept asking  the Father "Please just let it go through!"

 Then the lady behind her said "Sweetheart, I got it." The girl thanked her oozing with gratitude. She pulled out her $9 and the lady covered what was left, which was more than twice what the girl had paid. She asked the lady  "What's your name?" to which she responded "Noel." I said "Wow, do you know what your name means?" She thought I was going to tell some sort of joke but I said "Now all is well." I knew it was the Father's way of reminding me he will provide by watching him provide for others.

Sometimes my dreams are too small for Him but He never let's that stop Him and for that I am greatful! His dreams are bigger for me than I can imagine but I can't let the fear of that scare me! I can't wait to be used in the lives of others. Will you consider supporting me on this journey as I give back because He has and continues to give me so much?